Terrorists 100, Us 0

My cranky meter is off the charts this week. Two days of arguing with an uncooperative computer before finally getting it through my thick skull that my hard drive was dying. Replace hard drive, works beautiful. Except for that annoying little message "network cable is unplugged". No it isn't. Die you evil traitorous machine.

Next best thing, appropriate better half's computer and try to look potentially dangerous if he dares to speak to you. Yes dears, even he is on my short list this week.

To take my mind off of my current aggravation I thought we could take a lesson from our friends of Lite-Brite fame and discuss a matter of urgent national importance. Trent Lott's hair.

Trent was a busy little weasel this morning talking about all the reasons congress should not vote for a non-binding resolution against further troop deployments to Iraq.

His primary argument was that "it doesn't mean anything". Interesting argument for a politician, since when does most of what you say or do mean anything? I must have missed that memo.

His other argument being "it sends the wrong message to our enemies". Really? Let me get this straight then, are you saying that if this resolution passes then "the terrorists" will think they have won?

Here's a newsflash for you: they already won and they have neocon sissy-girls like you to thank for it. We are scared to get on planes, we are scared to travel overseas, we pee on ourselves when we see a burka, we will soon need national security clearance to get a drivers license and we see bogeymen in every corner. When our power went out here in Dumbassville the power company was flooded with calls from local intelligentsia who thought we'd been attacked by terrorists. Gotta give them points for creative thinking, I just assumed the system overloaded since it was 13 freaking degrees.

Now we are blowing up Lite-Brite sets and prosecuting advertisers for making "terrorist threats". It's only a matter of time before toy manufacturers are sued for selling talking dolls with terrorist messages. Let's not forget we can also thank Trent and his brethren for caving in and trying to institute their very own version of Sharia law. How many people do you suppose we can send to prison for oral copulation?

Yup, I have to say it, the terrorists won big time.

Now, about your hair Trent, it looks suspiciously like an IED. I say we blow it up.