Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Stuff I Learned This Week

Iraqi politicians should scratch Las Vegas off of their vacation travel list. Who needs more of this?

The French are more like Americans than anyone would have suspected. They are also fond of right-wing nutcases who were mediocre students. Expect to see Sarkozy on Lou Dobbs...they have a lot in common.

Americans still love the Queen of England because of her stalwart demeanor, her elegant hats and the fairy tale fantasy her life represents. I didn't get the memo about the hats.

I'm going to die early because I am a left-handed female. Probably from leprosy.

Most of my ancestry is French and they are not on my good list this year. I'm applying to become Igbo. I can get behind worshipping the Goddess of Yams, makes as much sense as anything else we're doing and I like yams much better than mean, crazy old men.


Anonymous said...

What would be the purpose of Lou Dobbs if not to pick on Mexicans?

Omnipotent Poobah said...

I think the Iraqis got that whole vacation thing from watchin' George cut brush.

pekka said...

Stuff I am thinking about right now;

Why should Iraqi politicians ignore Las Vegas, I don't get it? Hell, the scenery there is for them just like back home, isn't it! Ok, maybe without the camels.

Every Frenchman is a rich, cigar chomping cowboy but only in their secret/wet dreams. Fully awake, and they hate your guts by being aware that; "the damn Yanks wipe their butts with Hundred dollar bills".

Why on god's earth American's give a rats ass about the queen of England? You have your own dream weawers in Holly Wood, Disney Land and the White House. Why not stick with your own then?

Why is Mama worried about to die young due to her left-handedness? We all know, she propably will be killed in a shoot-out with a local neocon. And if not, then the hitmen for the oil and coal lobby will surely do her in.

Mama is blatantly using this Igbo application as a tool to negotiate better terms with the French. Besides, she would be totally unacceptable to Chukwu, unless she starts opening her doors wide open for the Jehova's Wittnesses.

Too much thinking...ouch...head is hurting...must stop now...

Not Your Mama said...

Nah, it's the human sacrifice thing that really grabs me ;).

Anonymous said...

Is there a goddess of Idaho potatos? I hate yams...


leftdog said...

Great post! On the Queen of England visit, whenever I see her on the news I always remember the famous words written by John Lennon and sung by the Beatles:

'Her Majesty's a pretty nice girl, but she doesn't have a lot to say."

She owns 7 Corgis. I only own 2.

TomCat said...

The Iraqi parliament was able to agree on one thing. They voted that that want the US occupation to end.

Not Your Mama said...

Go figure ;).

Hey, I like dogs but 7 would be a bit much for my house too. I have 3 dogs which some days seems like about 2 and a half too many.

Mixter, I don't think so but we can invent one. If Joseph Smith can "discover" a brand new gospel I'm sure we can discover a brand new goddess.