Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Progress and More Good News

500 or so people killed in a single day is certainly more efficient than the measly 80 or 100 we were averaging so yes, one could call that progress. With any luck at all when the arms we're selling to the Saudis (and the ones we're just flat giving away to Sunni Baathists) start funnelling into the various organisations and militias everyone can kill everyone else with enhanced efficiency. I don't know why I didn't see the beauty of this plan sooner. Have the Iraqis all kill each other thus freeing us up to start on Iran. Brilliant.

Ok, ok, so the markets are a little rough right now but that will all change once the Iraqis are all dead and we get the new and improved Halliburtonland up and running. I'm seeing golf courses and Del Webb Desert Oasis planned communities on the horizon. As an added bonus we can ship all of our Mexican workers over there to build it putting an end to the national have-you-kicked-a-Mexican-today sport and appeasing big, hairy, white guys all over this great nation.

Proof positive that Jesus is on our side: there is no drought, in fact Texas in particular is about to have an even greater abundance of water. Granted many people will lose homes if this flooding continues but think of the money they'll save on property taxes.

Now I know some people are probably saying but, but, but, bridges are collapsing and people are dying! Well, environmentalists and the anti-immigration people have been complaining about overpopulation so losing a few dozen here and there shouldn't bother either of those groups. Besides, if more bridges collapse it would become increasingly difficult to get in and out of some cities which would put a dent in illegal immigration. You've got to look at the upside here, right? True, if things got bad enough some people might have to do without some little amenities like, you know, electricity and stuff but the good news is they wouldn't have to pay any taxes!

Speaking of overpopulation, we need to get moving on reinstating the draft. We have millions of young teens waiting in the wings who will commence to breeding if we don't give them something more productive to do. Like go kill more people. Then again if we go ahead and let them start taking guns to school and arm the teachers....might take care of the problem.

In keeping with my new attitude I'll close with a plug for a brand new planned community right here in beautiful Pahrump, Nevada. For only $250,000 you too can buy a brand new, semi-custom home at Ishani Ridge just down the road a piece from moi. Granted there is no "ridge" for at least 100 miles or so but the homes do have a magnificent frontal view of several acres filled with invasive Salt Cedars and a chain link fence. Be sure to see Fely Quitevas for all your real estate needs so a portion of your commission fees will be donated to the Republican National Committee.



See, if you're a Republican there's always an upside!

3 comments:

Just My Thoughts said...

Well I would guess if some one would like to suck as much percieved influential penis as possible this lady is the champ.
I really don't find ass-kissing or sucking a wiener very good reference for any one.
Though I do note that most Repubs think this is the way to go.
I just hope all the Bush and Gibbons supporters get this idea. No matter how much you suck or blow they will dump you in a heart beat if you don't have what they want. And that equates to financial support. If you don't have the dollars then you are out.

Anonymous said...

I detect a hint of the cynical sneaking into both our blogs of late, Mama. I guess it must be the time of year? It's real good to have you back though.

Not Your Mama said...

Tired. Very, very tired.

No more tears for the foolish.